Blogger Sarah Bessey recently recalled a church event she attended as a teen who had had premarital sex. As the pastor made his case about the damage pre-marital sex can do, Sarah heard one message: your value is tied to your virginity. “If true love waits, I heard, then I have been disqualified for true love,” she wrote.
Churches and parents need to emphasize the importance of waiting for marriage to have sex. Not as an arbitrary rule, but because we are sexual beings, designed by God for monogamy. Chastity protects both men and women, and it helps society at large.
But while doing this we should never give the impression to those who have made mistakes that love and forgiveness is now out of reach. While chastity is crucially important, Christ’s death and resurrection are big enough to cover sexual sins, which in our culture are many. Christ can and does make whole the sexually, and otherwise, broken.